How To Reconnect With Someone
Like any good rollercoaster, life has its ups and downs. Situations change, new things appear, and people come and go. Sometimes we can control it, and other times scenarios get the best of us. Unfortunately, in the craziness that we call life, the endless lists and distractions might tug us away from certain people we cherish. Sometimes there’s this big event that causes two people to disconnect, but other times it’s a slow and gradual process. Then, one day, you suddenly realize that you’ve completely lost touch with a person you used to talk to habitually. Life slows down and you have a moment to reflect and remember that you miss them. If you’re feeling this way about someone in your life, it’s not too late. Here are some ways you can follow on how to reconnect with someone.
Use special events to spark a conversation:
Whether you had a falling out, distance got in the way, or your paths just seemed to diverge from one another, there is one surefire way to pop back up in someone’s life without being totally weird. Luckily for most of us, a holiday or special occasion is literally always around the corner. We have religious holidays, country-specific celebrations, New Years, birthdays, or a special date that might even mark a personal commemoration. Whatever the next important day might be, you can always use this as your technique to break the ice. This is typically done through an easy text which opens the door for more conversation.
Once the greetings/congratulations/commemorations are over, try to take up a conversation asking that person how they are. Ask them respectful, curious questions about their hobbies, jobs or family. You know this person, so use positive memories to your advantage. Remember; You are trying to reconnect with them after a gap in time. Things have changed, but the approach is the same. You must show that your interest is genuine. Speak of topics that had always come naturally to you both when you used to speak frequently. If this person is receptive, the conversation can become natural just after a few prompting messages.
Use social media:
Another easy way to re-forge a connection is through the less-personal world of social media. The strange part about all of our Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter accounts (or whatever other platform you use), is that our personal life is mixed with a public twist. It’s just as common nowadays to meet new people online as it is to reconnect with people we haven’t seen in ages. The good part about social media is that posts and stories give us immediate conversation starters. It starts off with a few likes or a comment on their post, with kind remarks. Maybe you get the glorious chance of a throwback Thursday photo which you can share with the person. A direct message or DM is another clear path for communication. Now you’ve just created a recipe for conversation starters.
Reaching out via phone:
But if you’re feeling a little braver, I invite you to try out the phone call. Most people nowadays avoid phone calls as if calling someone will give you cooties. We hide behind text messages which are easy to ignore or hard to read. The thing is, there are huge positives to calling someone in an attempt to reconnect. While a text might be left on read, a missed call is harder to do. People want to know why you called, because it makes the situation seems more serious. If they get a missed call, there’s a good chance that they’ll call back or at least text back if they are nice.
Another positive of calling is the noted effort. The person you are trying to reconnect with will know that you mean business and are really trying your hardest to reach out. It also forces the conversation to be more genuine and up front. So, you won’t have endless time at your fingertips before crafting the perfect response. You will both be pushed to be yourselves and in the moment.
Meet up in person:
Once you do make contact with your disconnected acquaintance, it’s important to analyze their responses. If they seem friendly and open to communication, your next and most important move is to take initiative to meet face-to-face. The easiest and most do-able way is to ask someone to meet up for a drink. It could be coffee or a smoothie if you like. Why a beverage instead of lunch or shopping you may ask? This limits the time of hangout out. Reconnecting with someone you haven’t seen in a while could be one of two things: awkward or amazing. If it’s awkward, you finish your drink in less than half an hour and you two move on with your lives. If it’s amazing – as healthy reconnections tend to be – no worries, because there is no shame in spending an hour or two in a café.
If I haven’t bored you and you actually watched all the way to the end, you’ve already made it clear that you’re taking some steps to reconnect with someone. I applaud you for that. Reconnection and reconciliation are good for the soul. AS LONG AS you’re reconnecting with a healthy past relationship. That being said, your reconnection will only be as good as your attempts. Give it your all and be genuine in your efforts. You have way more to gain than to lose.