You know a boy likes you on the playground because he makes fun of you. In college, this same guy will probably slide into your DMs, play a few emotional games, and stick close to you at parties to show the same. If you’re an adult asking “Does he like me?”, the signs are distinct. As adults, we hope to be mature and direct, which does happen some of the time. Other times, adults may be so mature they think they’re making it obvious that they like you without saying it, so you better be prepared to point out these 5 signs for adults!
1. He invites you to meet his people.
When an adult likes you, he’s going to integrate you into his people. “His people” is a way of saying his crew, his go-to’s, his closest peeps. This could be his friends or he could be a straight shooter who takes you to meet his family. He won’t do this with just anyone, because then his people would think he’s flaky – no, no, this behavior is saved for the girl he really clicks with.
The first real adult I dated was my current boyfriend. He was 30 when we met, so there was no silliness or game-playing from the get-go. Talk about #blessed. Anyway, after a few dates, he introduced me to his friends, but I quickly found out they weren’t his people. He was much closer to his family and kept them under wraps for a few months before I got the introduction. After a while, though, I found out he had only ever introduced two other girls to them, so once I made the cut, I knew his feelings toward me were more than legitimate.
Check out: How to know if a guy likes you
2. He keeps you in the loop about his schedule.
Ah, to date a grown-up who likes you. There’s no need to be sitting around waiting for news on your phone about whether or not you’ll see each other. There are few last-minute plans, cancellations, or, worse, moments of being ghosted. An adult who likes you isn’t going to play around with those kinds of games because he wants to prioritize you and see you during the week. He’ll keep you in the loop about his plans so that you can plan accordingly, whether that be by telling you he’ll be busy in advance or asking you to make plans together weeks or even months away. There should be very few surprises when it comes to when you’ll see each other.
3. He mentions things he likes about you.
While he may not say that he likes you directly, an adult male who likes you will mention the things about you he can’t get enough of. These should be a combination of appearance and personality-related characteristics, so you’ll get the full picture of what he thinks about you and why he’s into you. With my boyfriend, it started with him pinpointing the qualities I had that he found unique, like saying I always had a positive attitude or that I was a lot of fun when we went out. After a while, he graduated to the comment “I like everything about you,” which – if I’m being honest – is impossible, but hey, this was him saying he liked me without saying it directly. I’ll take it.
4. He asks you out on multiple dates.
Just because a guy asks you out once doesn’t mean he likes you. He may like the idea of you or want to get to know you better, but it isn’t until you really peel back the layers of a person that you can decide if they’re a match for you or not. That’s why a man who likes you will ask you out on multiple dates over a decent amount of time. This shows you are checking off all his boxes and that you’re leaving him wanting to know more after each date – you go, girl! Extra points if he is making plans for your next date during your current one because this goes to show how he is truly beginning to fall for you.
I had this happen uniquely after about a month of dating my boyfriend. Imagine my surprise when he asked me to go on a mini-vacation with him for four days after such a short time of knowing each other. Half of me was skeptical and thought he might end up being a serial killer, but luckily the other half thought he was just a super awesome guy, and that was the right side.
5. He’s always engaged in your conversation.
It’s hard to keep a day-to-day conversation interesting, especially if it’s about something like work or errands. A man who likes you, though, will truly find your conversation interesting and make it obvious. He’ll ask follow-up questions, be reflective of his emotions, and will smile and engage throughout the conversation. If he’s texting or calling you, he’ll do the same virtually. Another key part of this is that his online conversation should match his face-to-face one. Adults should be far less likely to hide behind a screen or change personalities once they meet you.
Check out: How to know if a guy has a crush on you secretly
Conclusion:
Dating as an adult is a whole other ballpark and, while it isn’t like this for every adult, most people are pretty mature about the way they handle things. If your man-friend isn’t saying he likes you directly, are you able to spot any of these signs? If not, you may want to see if you have a man-boy in your midst by checking out this post, “How to Know If a Boy Likes You.” Let me know your conclusion in the comments!