15 Signs You Were Never In Love
Let’s say you’ve been with this person for a while and you think you’re in love or maybe not. Most likely if you have to ask yourself that, then you’re probably not. Love feels amazing when you actually connect with someone on a deeper level. You grow together, learn together, and share experiences together. Sometimes this is not always the case and you start to learn that things aren’t working out anymore so it’s either time to exit or fix it. If you are still confused, here are 15 signs you were never in love.
1. You’ve only known them for a short period of time.
If you’re falling in love with someone within a week of knowing them, then that’s probably lust, not love. Granted, you can become physically attracted to someone within a few seconds and get to know the idea of them within a few weeks or months. But in order to truly know a person, it’s best to spend more time together, get to know how they behave so you’re not dealing with a psycho, share stories, and start being vulnerable and open up. That’s when you truly know a person and what’s going on in their life.
2. You love everything and everyone
Do you feel like you’re a little extra sometimes and do you use the word “love” instead of like because you strongly feel the need to express yourself? Like “Oh my God, I’m loving this Starbucks Vanilla Bean Frap, and Oh my God, I think I’m in love with that handsome cashier who took my order” If that’s the case, you’re just a little expressive and you might not even love it. You just say it just to say it. It happens and it’s okay. I’m not judging.
3. The cute dates are gone
Granted if you guys have been together for a long time, you can become a little bit lazy. I get that and it’s okay. But if you’re not putting any effort to go on dates or do date nights. Are the sparks still in the air? If you have no desire to dress up and look slightly better than usual for each other, you should probably wonder why. It’s crucial to spend and make time together to know that you still love each other, if not, are you still in love?
4. You don’t think about them
Do you think about yourself all the time and rarely think about the person you quote on quote love? I’m not saying you have to think about them on a daily basis, but if they don’t come across your mind once in a while, there might be a problem. When you love someone, you’ll occasionally think about them from time to time. It’s not necessarily that you always want them to be with you, but because you think they are special and that they have made a difference in your life that you cannot easily forget about.
5. You can easily walk away without taking any damage
If you can easily drop or ghost someone from your life, then you were never really in love. You just wanted to be with someone because you were probably bored or lonely. And if you can easily forget someone, then you probably just did yourself a huge favor by saving yourself some time.
6. You make them feel guilty
In the relationship, do you find yourself always wanting to be right? Do you find yourself always arguing over the smallest thing? Do you want to make them feel bad so you get the upper hand? If so, the relationship is pretty toxic. Real love comes when you start becoming empathetic and understand the other person. If you’re constantly trying to be right all the time and one upping the other person, then it’s probably an ego or insecurity issue.
7. You’re not growing together
Often, when you love someone, it’ll change you in a good way. You share experiences and ideas together, expanding your mind. From that point on, you’ll be forever evolving and growing, learning different lessons in life. If you are in a relationship and you’re not learning from each other, it’s probably because the connection you two have isn’t real and it’s not really love.
8. You don’t spend time with them
People who are in love will make time for each other and do things together. They look for new and exciting adventures which is along the lines of growing together. But instead, if you distance yourself from them and make excuses to hang out with other people, then you may not be in love.
9. You’re comparing your relationship to others
If you’re comparing your relationship to other people such as your friends or people online, then you might not be serious about the relationship. Doing so might even be toxic in a relationship. It’s a sign that you are not happy together and you want to move on. If that’s the case, you should ask yourself, “why you are with them in the first place?”
10. You don’t say “I love you” to them
I know, sometimes you don’t need to say, “I love you,” to actually love someone. But it sure does feel great to the other party receiving it. It makes them feel safe, special, and lets them know that you’re still there for them. When you’re not in love, you won’t feel the need or desire to say it and if you do, it won’t feel real or genuine. When you’re in love, everything will feel natural.
11. You don’t care what they’re doing
I’m not saying to put a tracker on their phone so you know where they are at all the time for love to exist. I’m just saying that if you love someone, you’ll at least have some interest of what they are doing or know their whereabout. You know, like just be a little nosey to see who they’re hanging out with. If you notice that you don’t care much at all, you’re probably not into them as much as you think.
12. Those feelings start to fade away
You might have really strong feelings for a person within a few weeks or months. You think everything is going well and there’s plenty of sparks in the air. You guys start saying “I love you” to each other every day. Then all of a sudden, those feelings start to fade away. Things starts to get repetitive. It could just be an infatuation, or that you’re bored and wanted attention. Not true love.
13. You do not bother to connect with their family or friends
If your interest level is zero to none to get to know their family or friends. This is a telltale sign that you’re probably not in love. Their family and friends are part of their life so if you don’t want to connect with them, you are basically blocking part of their life from you and you’re not in love with them as a whole.
14. You don’t see a future with them
If you ask yourself if you ever see a future together and your answer is, “no.” Then you probably don’t love them. If you are not planning things a year from now like a trip or things you guys will be doing together, then you’re probably not in it for the long run. If you’re not ready for a commitment, then you probably don’t love them.
15. There’s something off about the relationship
If the relationship is on and off, there is a problem. Because if you are in love, you don’t break it off one day and the next day you guys decide to get back together. In addition, if you are fantasizing the perfect partner and your partner doesn’t match your reality, then that could also be a problem. In this case, it’s not them, it’s you. You just have expectations that aren’t met. And lastly, you guys just talk and not communicate. Talking would be like making small talk and not acknowledging each other’s feelings. The talk is above surface and you aren’t willing to take the conversation deeper and communicate each other’s thoughts. These are potential signs that you’re just not into them and something is definitely off about the relationship. Here’s 10 signs you’re not meant to be in a relationship.
At the end of the day, you’re the judge if someone is “The One” for you. It could be hard ending a relationship but sometimes if you’re not in love with them, it’s best to just let it go. In the long run, you’ll just be hurting yourself and the other person that you’re with. Both of you guys deserve to seek love elsewhere if the person is not “The One” that you’re looking for. So, now, after knowing all of this? Where do you think you stand?