Knowing if someone misses you is a tricky subject. They could say they miss you when they just miss having company or they may miss you a ton and not say it at all. To clear up the latter, this video will break down 10 signs he misses you but is hiding it. Whether you two have decided to spend some time apart or you’re still close but facing a long-distance relationship, here’s how to tell if the distance is making his heart grow fonder.
1. He keeps you in mind when he makes plans.
Let’s say your birthday weekend is coming up next month. If you aren’t seeing this guy because you’re on the outs, he may leave that weekend open on the off chance you two reconcile beforehand. If you are simply far from one another, he may still keep the slot open in case you two FaceTime, talk on the phone, or he takes an impromptu trip to see you. The same could be said about bigger future plans, like whether or not he’ll accept that internship or job in a new state. He’ll be hesitant about planning things independently because he wishes you could be more involved in the decision-making process.
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2. He’s going places you recommended.
When you two were on speaking terms, you may have mentioned that you’ve always wanted to visit this cool park, museum, restaurant, or town but haven’t had the chance. Now that you guys are apart, you suddenly see him visiting the very places you used to talk about. Or, better yet, maybe they were the favorite spots you two shared. He might tell you that he went there or you may see him post photos at this place if you two aren’t chatting regularly. The point is that he’s reminiscing on spots you used to enjoy together or the spots that he regrets not taking you to in the past.
3. He’s interacting with your friends more.
Many guys have trouble swallowing their pride and speaking with a girl again after being apart for a while. He may even be talking to you as normal but be far physically. Either way, if he has access to your people – AKA friends, family, or other acquaintances – he’s going to talk to them when he wishes he could talk to you. If you two have no contact, he may suddenly be extra friendly to your friends online or if he runs into them in person. If they were already on friendly terms, he may go as far as to ask them to hang out. Chances are he’ll want to talk to them about you because he knows it’ll get back to you afterward.
4. He shows up at places you frequent.
You guys have put some distance between the two of you, but you can’t add much more physical distance because you both live in the same 30-mile radius. As he’s racking his brain for ideas of how to stop missing you, only one will top the lists – seeing you in person, even if it’s from afar. Since he isn’t crazy enough to stalk you at your home – at least, I hope not – he may show up at your favorite spots instead. Suddenly, he’s a member of the same gym, goes to your ideal coffee shop to study, or spends his Friday nights at your favorite bar with his friends. He hopes he’ll run into you to see if one of you breaks the ice and starts speaking to the other again.
5. He suddenly cares more about his looks.
This one is a bit of a double-edged sword because you can’t be 100% sure if he’s suddenly looking better for you or someone new. Many times, though, both guys and girls go through a makeover stage when they’re separated from the person they like or love. It could be post-breakup or post-seeing you with someone else, but it’s like a lightbulb goes off that says “I need to get it together. Let’s start with my looks.” He might suddenly sport a clean shave, get a new haircut, start working out, or swap his sweats for a nice button-down. No matter his reason, he’s definitely hoping that you notice and say something about it.
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6. He’s doing the things you suggested.
I’m going to give you a great example of this sign in action. In a past relationship, I always encouraged my boyfriend to travel. I was booking trips whenever I could and he barely left the 2 square miles of our hometown. When I broke up with him during our second break up – yes, it was one of those relationships – he suddenly posted that he had gone and gotten his first passport. Guess who was suddenly traveling? Was it for him? No, it was for me. Needless to say, we later reconnected and went out again. Yuck.
7. He tries too hard with other girls.
If you two aren’t dating and he misses you, he may try to make you jealous to see if you miss him too. After all, you’d only get jealous if you had feelings for him, and if you have feelings for him, you also miss him. If you hear through the grapevine that he’s hanging out with some girl, that doesn’t mean much, but if he tries way too hard by flirting with her in front of you or publicizing his hangouts on social media, he doesn’t like her, he just misses you.
8. His friends say he’s been down.
You hear from a friend of a friend who happens to be his friend that he’s been down lately. Ever since you two have separated, he’s just not himself; he’s staying home more often, keeping to himself, or going out with friends just to complain about not seeing you. He may not have the guts to say it directly to you or others, but everyone knows you’re the reason for this behavior change. The closer the source you hear it from, the more intense his feelings are.
9. He’s online a lot more.
There are two types of guys who are missing a girl. One type goes out and parties to try and distract himself, even though it rarely works, and the other becomes an introvert who either sits in sadness or uses the internet to distract himself. Lots of guys turn to gaming or online media to zone out of their real-world feelings, which means you may hear or notice that he’s much more present virtually than in person. They may be active on social media, always online via their messaging app, or constantly video gaming with friends. If you two are still in contact, they’ll seem to be texting you at all hours of the day even when there isn’t much to say.
10. He’s suddenly sharing your hobbies.
A guy who misses you may feel closer to you when participating in a hobby or interest that you love. He might not have participated in it beforehand, but now that you’re far away – be it emotionally or physically – he feels like he can reconnect with you by jumping on the hobby bandwagon. My friend Maria embraces her Latina roots and is a great bachata dancer. When she broke up with her lame-o ex Alex who only wanted to sit home on the weekends, he suddenly took up bachata lessons. Did he win her back? No. Was he trying to? Absolutely.
Check out: 11 Signs she misses you
Conclusion:
Apart from these 10 signs, if you’re intensely missing him, chances are he’s probably missing you too. Sometimes our gut feelings tell us more than any other sign, although it is helpful if you can also check off a few from this list. If you need any support during this time, feel free to pop a comment under the video! You know I’ve got your back.